where i've been and where i'm going

I haven't been anywhere. Especially here at the blog. It would be nice if I could say "Oh, I was SOOOO busy doing homework, I just had no time to blog." But that's not true, as my newest addiction to Pinterest would show. So, truthfully... I've been thinking about my life and going "it's not THAT interesting, so why blog about it?" Really. A lot of my life feels like it's the same thing day in and day out. How many posts can I make about the hilarious stuff that comes out of Cam's mouth? Too many, probably.

I've been thinking about the point of having this blog, too. I started it as a way to work out my spirituality (and get some feedback on it), but my spirituality has changed since I started this blog over two years ago. Hell, it's changed since last year, since the spring, since the summer. I've lost a lot of my religious trappings, and have settled into a fairly laissez-faire spirituality. What I believe is too personal/individual to be called a religion, I think.

When I changed my blog from Witch at Church to One Witch's Story, it was so I could write about my life, which included spiritual beliefs. And my story is changing, I guess. I have self-diagnosed myself with Celiac disease, on the basis of a high incidence of gallbladder disease (my gallbladder was FULL of stones when I was 18 and started developing problems. Had it removed 5 years ago next week) and gluten allergies and a statistically relevant incidence of kidney stones (had a few stones in my right kidney, which were taken care of surgically two years ago, still have one hanging out in my left kidney) and gluten allergies.

So I'm going on a gluten-free diet. A grain free diet, really, because I'm planning on starting the Primal diet near the end of this month (no grains, no legumes, no refined sugar, limited dairy.) And of course, I'm dragging Camden along for the ride. I'm taking him to the doctor next week so he can be tested for gluten allergies/intolerance. For myself, I'm doing the self-test (day 2 and going strong!) where I cut it out for a few weeks, then reintroduce it to see how I feel. I can't do that with Cam, though, because his daycare provides meals and won't let the kids bring in their own food... Which means that feeding him gluten free stuff at home then having him get it at school REALLY defeats the purpose. But if I can get the test (hopefully) saying that he had allergies or an intolerance, the school will provide the gluten free food (or let me pack his breakfast/lunch/snack, I'm not sure). Woo-hoo. Wish us luck for a positive, will you?

Also, I got everything in for grad school. My application was sent to the review board yesterday, so I'm playing the waiting game to hear back. I'm deathly nervous, but I'm trying not to think about it too much. Everything will work out in the end, I'm sure.

grad school

Today, I turned in the last bits and bobs of my graduate school application for the MAE program. It should be noted that I only decided to apply less than two weeks ago; everyone was certain there was no way in hell I could get everything in on time. But I did. So HAH!

Reviews of applications begin on Tuesday. Here's to hoping that I'm accepted!

Recital

Whelp... My recital is finally over with. Just in time, too. It went really well. My wrists held up for it (thank goodness, I think if it had been any colder they might not have) and I didn't get as nervous as I usually do. Typically, when I go to play for an audience, I get shaky and my legs tremble. My first piece, I had some trembling in my legs, but worked through it (and luckily my hands never shook). My third piece was a duet that I played with a friend, which went really really well. We didn't have any guidance on it, except for a few comments one time from our studio professor, so it's nice to know that we can throw together music and have it turn out really well. And my last piece was another marimba piece, which didn't go nearly as well as I had hoped or expected, but I'm okay with that (mostly).

On to pictures!


I did my recital with my friend Bob, who plays tuba. He ordered the cake, asking for it to say "Congratulations Sydnii and Bob" and the bakery asked if they could decorate it. (I'm assuming they were looking to practice, since they didn't charge.) Anyway, this is what we ended up with, a cake that we have jokingly named our "engagement cake."


Picture of myself and my high school (and college!) friend Cody playing our duet. I really wanted to do a duet on my recital, and I'm glad that Cody, who've I've known since he was a freshman in high school, was willing to help me out.


Playing some marimba.


Playing some more marimba, and looking fierce

Winter's End (almost)

(Photo by thanq)

At this time of the year, we are solidly in Winter's grasp. It's as though she knows her time is growing short, so she begins to throw everything she can at us. Imbolc is just around the corner, which is the beginning of the end of winter. This is the time of the year when the natural world is quietly slumbering and slowly gathering its strength to awaken in a few short weeks in a riot of color and life and breath. A time where I begin to get Spring fever and crave green and warm sunshine and gentle rains. It's as though I can feel the energy gathering in the world around me, and I can feel its affect on me.

I've been cleaning and organising my house almost nonstop for two weeks now. Not to say that it is any cleaner or more organised than when I began, but well, I've been trying. ;) Of course, this has probably been helped by having out of town visitors and new furniture (a "junior" loft bed for Camden) which facilitated a whirl of furniture moving (SFMA, anyone?) and other organisation. But I'm still ascribing most of the fault to the building energy I feel every time I step outside.

I've also been channeling some of this energy into more creative outlets. As I said in an earlier post, my senior recital is coming up this Spring. And I've been spending lots of time in the practice room preparing and learning the pieces I've chosen. I feel like I've gotten a lot of work done in the short time since the semester started.

I can also sense some of the effects it's having on Camden. We are slowly making strides to clearer speech. He's still not as vocal as a "typical" 4.5 year old, but he is more vocal than he was a year ago. But more than that, he's beginning to add end sounds (previously missing without prompting) to his words. Sometimes it's the wrong sound (rote or roke as opposed to rope), but any attempt is a step in the right direction.

I want to buy some crocuses. And, uh, let them "escape" into my (rented) yard. Crocuses are my favorite part of Spring, because they are its heralds. I smile every time I see them, especially when I see them poking up through the snow. Anyway. I hope you all are enjoying this time of quiet energy. I am!

Teacher Sydnii?

(Image not by me)
So for the last year or so I've been planning on being a teacher. Taking the necessary courses, jumping through the right hoops, looking up lesson plans/ideas on the internet. All these things so that when I'm out there in the real world, I won't be utterly lost (and as for the courses and hoops, well, I need those to graduate, too).

But just recently has it sunk in that I'm actually going to be a teacher. And I'm actually pretty excited about it. While it's not my ideal career choice (since I don't really have one), I am still able to be excited about it and feel good about doing it, which is important. I'm entering a position to be a musician, a musicologist, a music theorist, and a guide for impressionable minds. How is that not exciting?

I loved elementary music. And when I was doing my observation hours (55 hours of observing different grades), my hours spent in the elementary classroom were by far my favourite. And this may be a little selfish of me, but I want my students to have the same fond memories of me that I do of my elementary music teachers.

I've reached the point where I'm no longer ready to graduate just so I can be out of school or in the "real world". But I want to graduate so I can teach be a music teacher and inspire my students. (Gods, is that hokey or what? lol)

(And I promise, I'm trying to get back into the habit of blogging on a regular schedule.)

Life

I knew I wouldn't have much time to post this semester. I just wish I'd known what else this semester would be bringing me. This is by far the most stressful semester I've had. And it's showing. :( Both in my happiness levels (way down from usual--not good!) and my grades. I was supposed to graduate in May, but after experiencing this semester, I've decided to hold off on a few classes and just graduate in next December. This semester I've stretched myself nearly to breaking point, and if I'd stayed on course for next semester, I would have broken. So, after this semester, I'm taking it easy. Well, easier.

On Monday, I had a meeting with one of Camden's speech therapists. And she finally gave me a name for his speech problem: Apraxia. At the time, I thought, thank goodness, we have something to call it, and I didn't really think about the implications too much. Today, I actually read up on it. And it's terrifying. Not in and of itself. It's basically a miswiring between the brain and the muscles which facilitate speech. It's terrifying because there's no guarantee that he'll be able to talk clearly. This could be with him forever. Or therapy can beat it out of him, and he goes through life with no trouble. It is the uncertainty that gets me. I've said for the last two years, "well, he'll catch up." And now I can only hope and pray that he does.

It's not all doom and gloom, though. His speech is becoming more intelligible. And he's noticing (sometimes) when his words don't come out correctly. (He says "My mouth no working.") He's adding in consonant sounds where they should be, at least part of the time. Last week we were working on saying spider-man. He was saying it "buyer-man," but without a strong /r/ or /n/ sound. Now he says it Sss-pi-der-man. Which is amazing. He's an amazing child, and I am blessed to know him.

And since I know I'm going to miss it (because I always do), Happy Samhain/Halloween.

Rats!

So, I bought Camden a rat for his birthday. We named him Robin (because Cam is Batman).


And, well, when we got home, I decided I wanted to know everything about having a rat for a pet. So I get online, search around. And found out I did it wrong. :( Pet store rats = less than good. (Because they're usually bred for snake food, therefore, the breeder doesn't worry about genetics or socializing the animals). And also that rats need buddies. Since there aren't any good rat breeders (or rescues) near-by, I went back to the pet store. But she had already sold all the rats she had. So we had to wait another two weeks. And into our lives came Remy and Spencer!

We're still working on getting the rat twins acclimated to living with us, but I think that within the next month or so, we'll have a trio of happy rats.

In other news, we're happy that it's October. Because October means Halloween/Samhain time. Yesterday we made a Halloween cake (from a box, I was feeling lazy!) and bought a pumpkin. Today, the pumpkin got turned into a mean jack-o-lantern (per Camden's request) and its seeds are sitting in a bowl of salt water waiting to be roasted. Yum.

Before classes started (or just really early in the semester) I started experimenting with energy manipulation. Well, I was attempting to train myself to be more open to feeling/seeing/sensing energies. Sadly, this semester has been MUCH MUCH busier than I expected (or hoped) and everything but day-to-day living and school work has fallen along the wayside. Including any magical living ideals and this blog. But not to worry! Only eleven weeks left in the semester! :)

Thrift Store + School

School first, I think. Classes have started for the semester, and this semester is going to be CRAZY BUSY for me. I'm only taking 14 hours, but it breaks down into nine classes. Oh, the joys of being a music major, no? A lot of my time is going to be spent in the practice rooms this semester (and next) because I'm taking methods classes, where I learn to play brass, woodwind, and string instruments, and I have a recital coming up in April that I need to prepare for. EXCITEMENT. So I won't be posting much. I'm shooting for once or twice a week. And I won't have time to read everyone else's blogs, which REALLY makes me sad. :( I shall do my best, though!

Thrift Stores!

I adore thrift stores. I try to go into them with no specific purpose, other than to see what I can see. Because, if I have something specific I want, like clothes for Cam or me, or a table, the stores DO NOT have anything. However, I recently won an auction on Ebay that was an athame and a ton of herbs. The herbs mostly came in zip-lock baggies, which made the package smell delightful when it finally arrived. I was absolutely heady from the scent of all these different herbs. But, yeah. Keeping herbs in baggies isn't really ideal. (It's not pretty, you know?) So I headed off to the thrift stores, with the specific purpose of finding smallish glass jars to store my herbs. And I found them! Lots and lots! Which meant I got to enjoy the heady aroma of herbs some more, as I transferred them to the (newly washed/dried) jars.

So now I have a collection of herbs in nifty jars in my witchy cabinet. Perchance I'll get around to taking a picture later in the week.

Love!